Showing posts with label Moving on. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Moving on. Show all posts

Wednesday, November 26, 2014

#ArnoldReads: Dear Alex, Break Na Kami, Paano?! Love, Catherine

Alex Gonzaga is an author! Last September 27, she launched her first book about breakups and singlehood. It is written in Taglish (Tagalog and English) so it is actually an easy read, at least for me. The words were constructed as if she's talking right to you personally. As you can see her on tv, she's very humorous and witty, I am just so glad that it reflected in her book. 

I bought the book because I've felt I could relate to the topic. And as I was reading it, I really thought I was between its pages. It made me think of my previous relationships. It's like I was being reminded of the things I have experienced before, things that made me who I am now, a better and stronger version of myself.

A photo posted by Arnold P (@arnoldorina) on  
"Para sa mga single na, single pa, single by choice at di matanggap na single sila. Tandaan: Kaya mong maging single! BROKENHEARTED? PAANO?! Ito ang breakup survival guide ko. Alam ko kung gaano kasakit ang ma-heartbroken kaya ginawa ko ang librong ito para matulungan kang mag-let go at mag-move on. In the process, I hope na matutunan mo din na buuin at mahalin ang sarili mo. Hindi ka nag-iisa sa singlehood journey na ito. Let's share this moment together until we find The One God destined us to be with." — Alex Gonzaga  

I believe that the book is full of wisdom. Though everything that she wrote were just the basic and common steps in moving on, it will also help you somehow. This book is worth-buying, kudos to Catherine!

Friday, October 11, 2013

Ways to Get Over

Photo: http://pad3.whstatic.com/
Moving on may not be an overnight process but it always starts with acceptance. Of course I had to accept the fact that some things, including relationships, have its own ending. It hurts a lot though; I remember there was a time that all I want to do is just lie in bed and cry all day: I was not able to go to work, or if I do, I could never be that productive. I even skipped meals. Right after that separation, I felt like I will never go to move past it and bounce back from the pain. I thought about him constantly and everything seemed to remind me of what once was. During the first few weeks, even though I have gotten rid of the all keepsakes, my heart and my mind did not get cleaned out as fast as the trash. It took a little while but eventually I have recovered. Now I’m okay, I feel better.

Photo: www.breakupgirl.net 
It doesn't matter how long or short you and your ex-partner have been together, whether two weeks, two months, or two years, splitting up really hurts. I know that it’s not easy to immediately forget someone you loved before, especially if the love you gave was real. But you just have to remember, committing to the process of healing is one of the most significant parts of moving on. Little by little, you’ll definitely get over your ex. In no time, you will be back to your old self and he-who-shall-not-be-named will be just a thing of the past. The pain of a breakup can seem all-consuming, but I promise you it will eventually fade.

Cry. Just get all the pain out. Unexplained breakups could be so awful. You may feel that your heart has been literally broken into small pieces and it can be so hard to deal with especially if you are the one left behind. You could cry until you have given yourself a headache and all your tears have run dry. You can't commit to post-breakup healing if you've got all of that welled up inside, so I suggest have a good cry.

Create a distance between the both of you. No it won’t be easy but it is the most important rule after a breakup. I know that it will be difficult to let go of the everyday interactions, but you should. Even if you think you can handle it and still get over that person, you cannot. Don't fool yourself; feelings will get hurt. Moving away from him is a big step to the right direction.

Reconnect with your friends. At some point, everyone who has been in a relationship gave up a little of their time with friends to spend with their partner. This is your moment to make up with them. Go out and have fun. Remember how much enjoyable and fabulous being single really is.

Take good care of yourself. Breakup recovery is a life-changing process and when you’re going through essential life changes, you must take great care of yourself. Being single means thinking about you, you, and you only! Do the things that will make you happy. Take that spare time after work to pamper yourself because you can and you deserve it. Include extras like starting a new hobby, meeting a new friend, watching a movie, taking a long walk, and doing things that you consider fun.

Photo: http://www.thedogtrainingsecret.com/
Amidst this entire trying not to speak with him, going out and partying with friends, and eating lots of chocolates and ice cream, you also need to remember to sit back and really work through your feelings. Try to understand why things went south, and why you're better off this way. Focus on the good and positive things that are bound to happen. Forgive yourself for it is a certain path to free you up to have an amazing and wonderful life in the future. I am no Dr. Love or a relationship expert who gives advices to the broken-hearted but I hope these simple things could be your guide and help you to get well and move on.



Tuesday, October 1, 2013

Begin Again

Every day is a new beginning as they say, and today, I will start anew. My name’s Arnold and this is my new virtual space. I’m a 23-year-old hopelessly romantic gay guy who believes in ‘once upon a time’, ‘love at first sight’, and ‘happily ever after’ that, unfortunately, just got off an almost 2-year-old gay relationship which ended for about 3 months ago.

Our relationship, for me, was like a dream come true. Everything, I thought, was perfect. And losing him was my greatest fear. We first met online; a social networking site became a bridge to connect our lives. But just like any other relationships, ours, too, has come to an end. Believe me, breaking up and saying goodbye is hard to do, and it is harder to wake up the next day and to realize that he’s already gone. Breakups are never easy, trust me because I know. But of course, I don’t have an idea on everything about relationships, because if I did, then maybe I saved ours from taking apart.