Wednesday, November 26, 2014

#ArnoldReads: Dear Alex, Break Na Kami, Paano?! Love, Catherine

Alex Gonzaga is an author! Last September 27, she launched her first book about breakups and singlehood. It is written in Taglish (Tagalog and English) so it is actually an easy read, at least for me. The words were constructed as if she's talking right to you personally. As you can see her on tv, she's very humorous and witty, I am just so glad that it reflected in her book. 

I bought the book because I've felt I could relate to the topic. And as I was reading it, I really thought I was between its pages. It made me think of my previous relationships. It's like I was being reminded of the things I have experienced before, things that made me who I am now, a better and stronger version of myself.

A photo posted by Arnold P (@arnoldorina) on  
"Para sa mga single na, single pa, single by choice at di matanggap na single sila. Tandaan: Kaya mong maging single! BROKENHEARTED? PAANO?! Ito ang breakup survival guide ko. Alam ko kung gaano kasakit ang ma-heartbroken kaya ginawa ko ang librong ito para matulungan kang mag-let go at mag-move on. In the process, I hope na matutunan mo din na buuin at mahalin ang sarili mo. Hindi ka nag-iisa sa singlehood journey na ito. Let's share this moment together until we find The One God destined us to be with." — Alex Gonzaga  

I believe that the book is full of wisdom. Though everything that she wrote were just the basic and common steps in moving on, it will also help you somehow. This book is worth-buying, kudos to Catherine!

Monday, November 24, 2014

Dos and Don'ts After a Breakup

A relationship breakup, according to Wikipedia, is the termination of an intimate relationship by any means other than death. Breakups can be hard pero kahit gaano man yan kasakit, you should know kung ano yung mga bagay na dapat at hindi mo dapat gawin. These are the things na inadvise sa akin ng mga friends ko, nabasa ko sa articles sa internet at sa mga books, at yung mga bagay na narealize ko during the process.

Photo: closetconflicts.wordpress.com
Have a good cry. As I've already mentioned before, kailangan mo talagang ilabas yung lahat ng pain na nararamdaman mo dahil sa breakup ninyo. Umiyak ka lang hanggang sa mapagod ka ng umiyak, hanggang sa maisip mong hindi ka na dapat umiyak dahil sa paghihiwalay ninyo.

By any means, don't try to communicate. Creating a distance between the both of you will be a good start para maka-move-on ka. You gotta delete his/her number dyan sa phonebook mo. Wala na naman siyang care sa'yo, iniwan ka nga di ba? Hindi mo na siya kailangang itext or tawagan. With that being said, do not cyber-stalk your ex. I-unfriend at unfollow mo na siya sa Facebook, Twitter, at Instagram. Consider blocking them! It's none of your business to know what they might up to after ninyong maghiwalay. Actually, social media can be dangerous when dealing with heartaches and one of the common mistakes ng mga hiniwalayan ay ang pagpopost ng kung anu-ano. No matter how vague it is, don't post breakup dramas online. And remember do not bad mouth your ex-partner.

Don't seek for revenge. I understand that you got hurt pero worth it ba na makaganti ka sa kanya? No. Don't waste your time thinking about revenge. Mapapagod ka lang. All you have to do is to start picking yourself up. Focus on yourself and just be happy. Sabi nga nila, the best revenge is happiness. Never ever neglect yourself, your appearance and everything about you!

Surround yourself with family and friends. Call up your best friend or someone in your family who you think seems to know the right things to say about your situation. Talk to them, tell them what happened and I swear, they can make you feel better. These people can help you realize your worth.

It may sound cliche, but make yourself busy. If you're recently single after a difficult breakup, you know that it can't be easy to think about anything else at parang gusto mo na lang magmukmok sa kwarto. No, you should work on improving yourself. Get a new hairstyle, shop for new clothes, gawin mo lahat para magpabongga para sa sarili mo. You can also start a new hobby. Go the gym, try new sports, or learn how to cook. In my case, I started blogging.

When it comes to dating, there is nothing wrong with it at nasa sa'yo naman yan kung feel mo or hindi ang makipagdate. But also remember, don't rush yourself to be in a relationship  to try and fill your void. Don't sleep with anyone too soon. Never go for a rebound relationship. Bukod sa makakasakit ka ng feelings ng ibang tao, masasayang lang yung panahon na sana ginugol mo na lang sa pag-improve ng sarili mo.

Photo: oprah.com
Sometimes, some people are meant to fall in love with each other but are not meant to be to together. Sabi nga ni Toni sa concert niya, we really do not end up with our great love but with our true love. Some great love stories are meant to be great and yun na lang yun. When someone's leaving, hayaan mo na. Let them go kasi pag pinakawalan mo na yung taong yun, yung ex mo, then you're ready to meet the one that you're supposed to spend the rest of your life with.

Heartbreak is a fact of life and it happens to all of us at least once in our lifetime. Recognize the things that might have caused the breakup, learn from it and move forward. You have to be patient with yourself, moving on can't be achieved in just a day. Accept the reality and all the feelings you are experiencing. The only person in the world who can change the way you feel now is you. Love yourself and find the true happiness within.